I honestly like my job, but when do I say enough is enough. When can I put my health before my career?
In the short two years I have been working with the company I have been presented with some amazing opportunities. A lot of these opportunities involve travel. It’s a very unpredictable job. I don’t have a set 9-5 job… if something comes up, I’m there. And for the most part, I will sit there for a minute, then tell myself that I’ll get some good karma back my way if I do this.
Usually I don’t have a choice, if I’m asked to do something, I have to do it, it would be selfish not to right?
This year I started netball coaching, and I love it, but already this year, I’ve had to miss 4 training sessions.. the season only started a month ago. I’ve missed HALF of the training sessions. And I will miss another 3 for certain, this season.
I was brought up in a very good household. I was never babied or was given everything I wanted. I was raised with a Australian born German father. I was taught to work hard for what I want, and I do. I still will in the future…. but, I’m almost at the point where I need to decide.. do I do quit netball completely and just make sure I’m always available for work? Or, do keep juggling them both and keep letting my girls and my co-coach down.
She is not supposed to be coaching, she’s my mentor.. what kind of coach am I if I’m never there…
I’ve mentioned in previous posts how this year has been incredibly taxing on my physical and mental health, but it’s all come to a head. Work and social life are overlapping, old injuries have come back, new injuries have appeared, I have a constant migraine and I don’t even have any spare time go to the doctor without some questioning looks when I walk out the office early.
I’m good at keeping quiet and doing what I’m told. I don’t complain about being asked to do things that interfere with my social life, because work comes first. But what if I have no social life? What if I’m always so worried about impressing my bosses that I end up seriously sick.
I want to peruse a career that I love. One that I feel happy to wake up and go to work. Wherever it may be. I honestly enjoy my job. I went through uni to do this job, but something is nagging at me. Tugging my down.
I shouldn’t feel like I’m a disappointment to everyone, to my bosses, to my netball mentor, to my partner. This job is making me feel awful. Sometimes I wonder if I have convinced myself I like my job because I keep telling myself I do.
I would love to have a career making people happy, and encouraging people. Maybe I feel as though there is things going on within the company that I don’t agree with. Maybe I’m conflicted with what is expected of me and what I believe.
With all this stress going on at work, should I not be allowed to have some free time doing something I actually enjoy? I think I do deserve it. Work should not be my life, nor should it be anyone’s. Even if you love your job, make sure you give yourself some time, your family and your friends some time. There’s no point in working and making money if you have no life to use it.
My message to anyone reading, don’t give up your happiness. What’s a life without finding happiness. Find something that lifts you up, not something that drags you down. Your worth more than that.
Until next time…